I hate olives… I really do.
And, I think you should hate them too.
In fact, why not just erase them from the planet. The crazy people who like them can go to another one to enjoy olives. Ugh. Even the word. Eeew!!!
Recently someone uttered a few words which made my mind pause …”Americans have a lot of pride.” During that pause, my mind agreed with a resounding yes … but, that short sentence included ME. And, well it should. Pride. What an ugly word. But it has made me examine myself … and I hope this exercise won’t be cut short of its goal of full discovery.
First, I have to ask myself what are some of the markers of that monster pride lurking in dark corners of my heart? I don’t imagine it is going to be an easy discovery.
The first which comes to mind, already mentioned, has to do with preferences. What I like, others should like … or at least appreciate. What I dislike, well, it definitely helps if you dislike it too. This can be overt, as in the olives illustration, or it can be subtle.
Healthy relationships include sharing ideas. We talk about lots of things as humans. We talk about weather, vacations, experiences, and a whole host of things. But, looking at our closest associations, do I insist upon those who are my friends agreeing with me?
Do I accept as a friend someone who has a different view politically, religiously, on a social issue? We could add a lot of topics here … but do I insulate my ideas with friends who mostly agree with me? If I do … and especially if I find myself fading away from a friendship once I discover a clash of ideas … what does that say about me?
Am I so fond of my ideas that I never want to dialogue with someone who has an opposing point of view? And, if I don’t mind dialogue or debate, how do I treat someone who thinks differently?
Do I really CARE how they think? Do I allow them to fully express their ideas, or do I break in with the need to convince them as soon as possible of their wrong thinking? Do I treat them as I would want to be treated, or as a project to be refinished? Do I really communicate care for their soul? Do I remain close to them if at all possible, even if I don’t seem able to change their view?
How often do I use disparaging and derogatory terms like silly, stupid, dumb, ugly … to describe anything or (hopefully not!) anyone that I think falls beneath my dignity? When I go through my day … those kinds of words would be good highlighters for pride. Including in my thoughts.
Pride, it would seem, should be banished from our place of worship. But, sadly … I am afraid it is quite at home there too! In fact, nothing seems to display it better than MY theology. MY music preferences. MY ideas of how church members should behave. MY preferences as they relate to religious life and church gathering. Wow. How utterly sad is that!!!
When the “fruit of the Spirit” includes love and peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness … meekness and self control. Those seven out of nine listed fruit are all a kick in the teeth for pride. So, if we see them little, what does that say?
Pride can even be found in prayer … and if my prayer is less about asking God for mercy, help, grace in midst of my failure and weakness, and more about asking Him to assist ME in the wonderful things I am doing?
Well . . .
Pride also shows in what annoys me, or makes me angry. Do I get most angry at what affects ME … being misunderstood, mistreated, spoken badly about or towards … do I get irritated when MY plans are thwarted, my priorities messed up, my goals usurped by someone else’s goals? What really and practically makes me upset? (Not what do I think SHOULD make me upset), but I ask myself, what is the last thing I got upset about?
Pride also shows in comparison. Do I compare my house, vehicle, family, church, possessions, skills, or anything … with those of others?
Another pride marker: What do I laugh about? This is a serious one. Do I make fun of people? Ever? Even thinking that I am just teasing? Do I mock anyone? Do I enjoy their weakness or weirdness?
Finally, what am I building right now?
Am I building a monument to my pride … whether a reputation, a property, a bank account …? Or, is my life focused on building in the lives of others? Helping in true humility when they are struggling … caring enough to throw my plans to the side?
Yes. We do have a lot of pride. I do. And, I suspect that there are more dark corners to discover with the Light of truth. May God shine it!
(Guest Post by Tressa Lancaster)
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